One girl and one boy is just not enough.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Randomize
