She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
