Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
