All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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