i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
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