My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
