ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
