doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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