After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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