he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Randomize
