I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
