I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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