you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
