Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
