You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
