I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
