i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
Do vagina's smell?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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