I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
