oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I wish i was in the wii world.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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