yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
