The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
