Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize