i just identified you from a description of your pipe
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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