how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
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