i just google imaged poop.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
