East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Randomize
