Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize