Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
