just survived the first fart of the relationship.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
i think im in europe. pls send help
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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