its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
