whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
