Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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