There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
