can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize