Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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