I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
