I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I understand Curling. That high.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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