problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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