my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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