strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
