Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
