Joe is yelling at the trees again.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
