dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
are you so shy because you have an std?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
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