Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
