I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
how do flat chested girls get laid?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
