It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
