guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
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