We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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