So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
