I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
